Thou shalt not stare

Since we moved into our current flat I have been catching the tube (rather than bus) to work. This has resulted in most trips to work being both unpleasant and uneventful. In the tube, you are packed so closely to the person next to you that there simply isn't room for anyone to move, let alone do anything bizarre or entertaining.

This morning I was really not looking forward to my journey in to work. Aside from dreading the tube journey, it was also snowing outside and I wasn't relishing the prospect of being snowed on during my walk to the tube station. Nonetheless, out I stomped, in my coat and rain jacket. Sure enough, the tube journey was uneventful. The only thing differentiating it from any other tube journey was that the snow seemed to result in more people catching the tube than usual, and so it was even more tightly rammed than expected. Nonetheless, so far, so normal.

Then I got out at my tube station, Holborn. I joined the throng of the working crowd leaving the station and stomping off to their respective places of work. As I walked along the busy pavement, there was a fellow next to me on a bike. He was cycling at the speed I was walking, so I didn't really pay much attention to the fact he was on the pavement rather than the road. Unfortunately for the cyclist, another pedestrian took great umbrage at this fact, shouting at him "walk it, why don't you" to which the cyclist responded sarcastically "yes, because I'm going so fast I'm a danger". The rule "thou shalt not talk to strangers" had been broken, which was surprising but not shocking.

The two men were unremarkable looking. The cyclist was probably in his 40s, wearing a suit and rain jacket and with a helmet on his head. The other fellow was probably in his 50s, slightly tubby and wearing a suit, coat, hat and carrying a large umbrella with a curved wooden handle. Both appeared to be on their way to work.

Then, as I kept walking, pretending to ignore the two men, the pedestrian lurched towards the cyclist. With an agility that belied his age and girth, he nimbly held the pointy end of his umbrella and, like a masterful fencing pro, thrust the curved wooden handle into the spokes of the cyclist's bicycle, effectively brining the bicycle to an immediate and complete stop. The cyclist admittedly was going at such a slow speed, he didn't come off the bike, but instead stopped and simply shouted "what the hell are you doing?". A short verbal argument ensued. Meanwhile, most of us who had been walking nearby were so shocked by the incident we all stopped and blatantly violated the "thou shalt not stare" rule of English conduct. I stood there staring for some time, watching the argument unravel and waiting for what seemed an inevitable punch-up. When it didn’t happen, I went on my way. So did most of the other spectators.

I know cyclists are annoying, but it's rare to see one attacked. Especially when the cyclist in question is absent the usual factor that provokes pedestrians to fits of range: the wearing of a full-body lycra suit. And it seems even more unlikely that the attacker will be a podgy, middle-aged man in a suit at a time in the morning when most of us are still waiting for the caffeine to hit.

At least for once my journey to work wasn't boring.